Career Tips - Issue # 35 (Dec 2006)

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Psychology of Change

As we usher in 2007 in the next few days, some daring souls among us would be making New Year resolutions--no smoking, exercises, more time with family, learning something new, living happily, losing weight and so on. Indeed, this time of the year brings with it an urge, along with a renewed sense of optimism, to change ourselves and become a new person in the New Year.

When it comes to changing ourselves, however, there is good news and there is bad news. First the bad news: Changing habits is a formidable challenge. If you have ever tried to kick off a long-standing habit, say, smoking, or tried to cultivate a new one, say, becoming vegetarian, you would agree that change is not easy.

Strangely, even the fear of death is not enough for people to change their habits. According to Dr. Edward Miller, as quoted in the Fast Company magazine, two years after having coronary bypass surgery, 90% people do not change their life style. Imagine our resistance to change!

Now, the good news: We can change--if we outplay our own "psychology of change." Psychology of change sounds like a heavy stuff, but there are four simple ideas here.

First, mere intellectual reasoning or logic does not propel people to change. Knowing regular exercises are good for health is not enough for people to get up early and start jogging. According to John Kotter, a Harvard Business School professor, behavioural changes happen mostly by stirring up and involving people's feelings.

So, idea # 1: Whatever be the change you may want to see in the New Year, let the logic of it sink down to your heart. Involve your feelings!

The second issue is how the argument for change is put forward--positively or negatively? Studies show we respond better when the reason for a change is wrapped up in the promise of a positive result. Telling ourselves, "I must eat less otherwise I would look lousy and contract diseases" has less impact as compared to conveying the same message with positive flavour: "By eating less I would look fitter, more beautiful and lively."

So, idea # 2: When you think about changing some habit or behaviour, think in terms of some attractive benefits and gains, and not in terms of fear, worry and loss.

The third idea concerns our natural desire for rewards and appreciation. In this regard, one must follow the advice of Amy Sutherland, an author who has studied how animal trainers train dolphins, cougars, elephants and other creatures to develop new habits--and drop the unwanted ones. And her prescription for changing anyone's behaviour is simple: Reward desirable behaviour, ignore undesirable. Interestingly, she tried this theory on her husband who, just like the animals, changed many of the habits that used to irritate Amy.*

So, idea # 3: Appreciate and reward yourself every time you do something right. And just ignore--don't bash--yourself when you slip, i.e., when you fall into old habits.

Finally, one sure way of triggering change is to stay more alert and aware of our own behaviour and actions. When we first learn driving, we remain aware of the various movements of our hands and legs, but soon, with repeated practice, these actions become automatic. Similarly, many deep-rooted habits or actions are automatic because they, after many repeated cycles, now reside in our subconscious. And the way to get rid of them is to first become more aware of what we are doing or not doing at any given moment. For example, right now you seem to be reading this newsletter, but are you fully here or your mind is wandering somewhere else?

So, idea # 4: Be more alert and aware of what you're doing at any moment. This heightened awareness itself would lead to transformation and change.

>>CAREER TIP: Our habits--both good and bad--affect not only ourselves but also those who work and live with us: parents, brothers and sisters, children, friends, spouse or colleagues. What's that one change in your habits that can make someone else's--who matters to you--life more lovable, enjoyable, peaceful or convenient? Let that be your New Year resolution, a gift for that person and, above all, an experiment with your own psychology of change.

Wish you a very happy and successful New Year!

*Note: Are you interested to read Amy Sutherland's article published in the New York Times about how she successfully applied the training tips from the animal kingdom to bring about change in her hubby's habits? Let me know, and I would be happy to forward that article to you.

Atul Mathur

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***Copyright 2006 Atul Mathur***

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